....Surreality hit her hard. She woke up. Staring in the mirror is a figure so empty and strange yet familiar.Then she realizes, its her.Maskless her. Everyday, she masked herself, to meet the expectations of people around her.A good daughter, a good student, a good friend, a good companion and even, a good lover.people never knew that. they never wonder.each time she peers into the mirror and look pass the masks into the soul, she refuses to admit that she, needed companion too. Companion close to her inner soul.In her heart, she always thought that by being and giving all of yourself to others, she'll feel that her purpose in life is fufilled. finished.because she's done all that she could have done.that is why she always does her best in everything that she's given.But she's not a robot. Sometimes, she wished she wasn't alone too.Or maybe, she wished that she could have let someone accompanied her. Looking into the mirror, emotions sang a melancholic symphony as she sniggered at herself. Tears rolled down her cheeks as water fell on her in the bathroom. In here, she cried. As always. In here, no one could hear her cries and she could finally remove her mask.tears fell and fell.For she knew there's no other place for her to do so. For she knew, this is her chosen way of life..For she believe, setbacks are what made her stronger.what doesn't kill her made her stronger. And all these are for her to bear.alone. she would not let anyone walk down the lane with her.no one is supposed too.she used to think that there might be just this one special one who would do so.but,she woke up from her dreams long ago.she is no longer the girl that only knew how to cry in her parents' hugs and seek support. she is no longer the girl that cries everytime she falls.and she is no longer the weakling that let things hit her the hard way.she's been through alot that might have break some. she's born alone. and she have to live her life this way, for there is not one who's oblige to walk her through her life. Instead, reality would.
Things happened. And many a times. they were unexpected. Yes. She might have a weak side of herself only known to herself.but she would never let it overrule her.she build up this armor, for years, so that nothing would hurt her deep no matter what. till one person walked into her life and took a piece of her away from her, hidden somewhere. now, she is torn between dreams and reality again. something died within her when things start to goes wrong.the expectations towards love maybe.hope.and it hurts even more when she isn't perfect.Once, someone told her she will met someone who will cherish her like a gem, keeping her close to her heart.when she's tired,someone will ask her are you tired ? when she's down , there would be a shoulder in which she could lie and cry on and the someone would pretend not to see. unspoken words speaks most.and affection allows one to settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses.Some men go through a forest and see no firewood.maybe someday,she might meet hers too. the one meant for her.
Meanwhile. A day grows old as we do. Do not wish death upon it. Let it live, let it love, and only then should you let it rest in peace.Turning off the shower tap, her mask is back again.
am i doing the right choice by opening up to you ?
♥ Wednesday, July 30, 2008
